Monday, April 18, 2011

Missing my family :(:(

Before i got married, one of my biggest worries was how will i cope without my family so close by. I knew ahead of time that i will be moving to the UK because i wanted to do my masters degree. So the issue was on my mind all the time. It was the thing i thought about the most.

Whenever i opened this topic with anyone they'd say you'll get used to it. Reality is, i haven't gotten used to it. I have been married for nine months (Alhamdullah), and got a chance to see my family twice ONLY. Once was when i came back from my honeymoon, and the second time when they visited me here. The first time i got to see all of them. The second time it was only my parents and one of my siblings.

How do i feel?
My heart aches so much, and there are days that i just cannot handle the feeling. I cry sometimes. Other times i hold it inside of me. I call them, but its not the same. I continue to feel that a huge part of me is missing. It is really hard. It is as hard as i thought it would be and even harder.

Before i came about to writing this entry i was trying to study in preparation for my upcoming exams. In the midst of it, i called my mom, then i text my dad. Then i continued to study, and while i was doing that i got a text from my dad. My heart just squeezed because i miss soooooooo much. I miss both of my parents so much. I miss my siblings. I wish they were here with me.

I'm married now, and have started a family of my own, and soon my family of two will have an addition. It is the cycle of life i guess, but with all that fully understood by me, i cannot help but have such feelings. I just wish i could jump on the first flight and go to see them, but that is not possible now and even if i did once i leave the feeling will not disappear.

I have always wondered and now even more so how do people cope with missing their parents? their siblings? I cannot seem to have gotten that. I do not think i ever will :(:(

I love my family so much, and cannot help but miss them every passing second of everyday.

5 comments:

ibeebarbie said...

Salam Happymoi,
How lovely to see a post from you; however, sadly reminded of my own feelings of days gone by. Very real feelings you express indeed. For me, it's merely been the passing of time that has afforded me from missing my family so terribly. Even with my mom no passed on, God be with her, time has help subside the horrific pain which I initially felt. However, this does not keep those moments in life from bringing up these very real feelings you express.

Sending you hugs.

Hana S Libya said...

Salam Happymoi,

Firstly congrats for your soon-to-come family addition. Inshallah he/she will see a better Libya!

When I first came here to the UK, too, I thought that I'd never feel nostalgic... I'm a grown-up and crying is for babies, plus I know what life's like abroad! But a few months ahead... I started feeling the zingers of a lonely life. No family around me. No brother to pester me. No interruptions whatsoever.

It relieved me that they came every Ramadan to visit me... but now that I'm here, and they're ... there. It's heartbreaking. But we're strong people nevertheless.

I think the major thing that helped me cope is my studies. I just busied myself with books and research, and shopping in my free time. It's important to have good friends, though. Oh, and keeping a journal if you're into writing personal stuff in a notebook :")

Wishing you all the best. And keep writing. It helps ;)

Hana S.

V. Archana said...

Hi

This was the first link which cane up when I searched for 'missing my family'. You just spoke my heart. I am in the same feeling of being far away from my parents after marriage. :( its something that's just gonna be there throughout my life no matter what u do or where u r,nothing can make u not miss your parents n siblings :(

Nice blog btw.

lee woo said...

Love is when he gives you a piece of your soul, that you never knew was missing. See the link below for more info.


#missing
www.ufgop.org

Silvia Jacinto said...

Life is a battle, if you don't know how to defend yourself then you'll end up being a loser. So, better take any challenges as your stepping stone to become a better person. Have fun, explore and make a lot of memories.

n8fan.net

www.n8fan.net