few words in favour of the year 2011 :D

Today is the last day of the year 2011. It has been a year full of changes and challenges. I hope the new year brings much joy and happiness to everyone.

The up side of the year 2011 :

It was the year i was awarded with the title 'mommy'. It is the most amazing feeling anyone could feel.

It was the year that Libya ended its long dictatorship. We lived and prayed for this end and finally our dream has become a reality.

It was the year that my husband and i learned to live in an environment different than our own and it was the our one year wedding anniversary :):):) ( Who would have said it would be the only year celebrate just us;) from now on its us + our son :D:D)

It was the year my husband started learning English. Now he can 'emashi omooraah'. That is another accomplishment.

It was the year that i learned how to live with much of life's challenges.

It was really an outstanding year despite all the wounds that will take very long time to heal.

I hope and pray that Allah accept Libya's Marytrs and give their families patience to endure the pain.

For the year 2012 - inshallah- I ask Allah to guide me, my family and dear ones, and to help us do our best.

I ask Allah to help all those that are working hard for the sake of Libya. Inshallah etkoon sanet khair.

I'm hungry. The food smells good.It has to smell good. It is made by my mother in law.
It is lunch time. Tomorrow : a start of another week of work, please let there be some work to be done.

Happy 60th anniversary Libya and other bla bla :D

Today marks the 60th anniversary of Libya's independence. It is a day that has been supressed by the former reigime for so long. It just feels good to say happy independence day Libya!

Today started with us all waking up at 11am. It is a holiday so we slept in. We woke up took our showers dressed up nicely - treating the day like a Friday;) It was nice! We had breakfsat - late breakfast then i took the time to fold the piled luandry. Laundry is never over for me! Now that i finished folding i have a basket full. Well if you count my son's small basket that means two! I'll be doing some today and some tomorrow as im planning to go out with my husband and get some grocery shopping done - inshallah!

I have not been up to much. I'm upset at what i keep reading online. It hurts what people are saying about each other. I wish that people will put the benfit of Libya as a whole first! I dont mind crtisizim but it has to be constructive! Lately, i have not seen much of that. It is like everyone wants to get the fame to take part of histroy but by making everyone else look bad! I have made a decision not to speak of anyone because what i think could be wrong. People need to understand that having a different opinion is ok. It is not with us or against us...Lets not crtizise the person but the ideas/work....With all that im not into politics, im more for assiting the civil society, like really taking part and volunteering, i want to fit some in my schedule if i can now if not then inshallah after i finish up my masters! I miss volunteering!

II'll be going to work tomorrow to get some papers done then probably officiallly return- inshallah. This will keep be occupied. Add to it my studies. I have to hand in an essay in March online - thank God i can hand it in from Libya online to the UK. Internet does wonders! In the main time and before i can start on my essay i have to do some revision, hope all works well. International Trade Law is really challenging but the good thing about it is it is very interesting- I like it so far! It is my last subject inshallah to get my masters. I'll be doing it along with my dissertation. I was supposed to finish it in the summer but beause of the birth of my son i applied for an extension and i was granted it- Alhamdullah! Now im following the module online but will return to the UK closer to my exam time! Wish me luck!

SOON - Thank You KadijaTeri for the versile (sp) award, soon ill post my part :D

Best Friends?!

It could be a week ago that i had a status on my facebook account questions the defination of a ‘best friend’. It is been awhile that i wanted to discuss this on my blog but because i never made the time to set and write my thoughts away i decided for the time being to put it as a status. So i did. Not many have partcipated but my wonders have not stopped. It is not that i dont have a defination of it but rather i wanted to see others point of view. For me, it has not been the same. My defination kept chaning and according to it so did my best friend. The thing is it is not just the fact that my defination changed but rather the way my life has been. I was not raised in one place. I lived in the USA, Canada, UAE, UK and Libya. I did not stay in one country more than six years in a row. This resulted in different realtions. I make friends then i leave. I come back and i feel that i have missed important things in those friends lives. They share stories of a past that i wasnt part of. I have always dreamed of how it would be like if i had one best friend. A friend that has been through it all. A friend that has been there in hardships and ease throughout. Someone that knows me inside out. But no i dont have that. I have lots of friends. Up to date my best friends are those i made when i lived in Canada. I spent my teen years there. I was there until i turned 20 years old. Those friends are the best i have had. I’m still in touch with them but it is not the same though. Sometime i think maybe when years pass by they will be just an important part of my past but just that. They are still in touch but its not the same like being together i guess. My defination of best friends remain that – them. It was them that gave me the defination, the guidelines - everything!
This life style led to my relationships being like that off and on off and on. I keep in touch as much as possible but its not the same. Add to it the defination. Do you agree that best friends change as places change, as people change, and life changes and as you yourself change? Let me know your thoughts!

Happymoi is back to the blogging world:)

Without writing it seems that a big part of me is missing. Facebook alone is not enough. It just feels right to return to blogging. I do not intend on turning my website to politics I have had enough on facebook. Every time I log on someone has something in those lines and although I understand how important such participation is I feel that I need a break. I spent this past year crying my eyes out and at the same time trying my best to juggle my role as a student, a wife, and a mommy to be. All this in the midst of the revolution.

Now I'm trying to organize my life here for the few months I'll be here before my return to the UK to do my last exam and to finish working on my dissertation. I intend to start working this coming Thursday. So again I'll be juggling my life as an external student, a wife and a working mom. I hope things work out for me and everyone.

I'll leave with this quick update and hope you are all doing well in our inshallah bright Libya.

Missing my family :(:(

Before i got married, one of my biggest worries was how will i cope without my family so close by. I knew ahead of time that i will be moving to the UK because i wanted to do my masters degree. So the issue was on my mind all the time. It was the thing i thought about the most.

Whenever i opened this topic with anyone they'd say you'll get used to it. Reality is, i haven't gotten used to it. I have been married for nine months (Alhamdullah), and got a chance to see my family twice ONLY. Once was when i came back from my honeymoon, and the second time when they visited me here. The first time i got to see all of them. The second time it was only my parents and one of my siblings.

How do i feel?

My heart aches so much, and there are days that i just cannot handle the feeling. I cry sometimes. Other times i hold it inside of me. I call them, but its not the same. I continue to feel that a huge part of me is missing. It is really hard. It is as hard as i thought it would be and even harder.

Before i came about to writing this entry i was trying to study in preparation for my upcoming exams. In the midst of it, i called my mom, then i text my dad. Then i continued to study, and while i was doing that i got a text from my dad. My heart just squeezed because i miss soooooooo much. I miss both of my parents so much. I miss my siblings. I wish they were here with me.

I'm married now, and have started a family of my own, and soon my family of two will have an addition. It is the cycle of life i guess, but with all that fully understood by me, i cannot help but have such feelings. I just wish i could jump on the first flight and go to see them, but that is not possible now and even if i did once i leave the feeling will not disappear.

I have always wondered and now even more so how do people cope with missing their parents? their siblings? I cannot seem to have gotten that. I do not think i ever will :(:(

I love my family so much, and cannot help but miss them every passing second of everyday.

Momy to be inshallah

I have decided that this evening i will set and spend sometime writing on my blog. As i said in my previous post that i have so much to share. Really! I know i should have written earlier but i keep postponing this task that now it is sooo long overdue, and probably not the right time. Still, i just feel the need to write away.

My picture maybe a little ahead from what i want to share but i liked it and thought this will be it.

So what is it that i want to say?

Happymoi is expecting her first child inshallah (yes, ME). It is a very exciting time for me and my husband- Alhamdullah. We both wished that things were better and that our happiness was complete by the well being of Libya and Libyans. Inshallah we are hopeful that things will get better before the arrival of our first child inshallah. It is only then will such a joyous occasion be complete.

My due date is inshallah towards the end of July. It will be in the midst of me writing my dissertation to get my masters degree inshallah. So it will be a very very very busy time. I hope though that things work out in the end.

We really really cant wait, although we know ahead of time that it will be veryyyyyy challenging especially with our schedules at the current time. Bes inshallah khair.

My heart is broken for Libya

I have not written in my blog for so long and here i'm writing again.

I have so much to share. The starting point of my blog is my dear country Libya. Oh Libya, i think of you and my eyes are full of tears. I had a plan to visit during April since i moved to the UK. Sadly enough, the situation now is not suitable for making such a trip.

I watch the news and my heart is full of pain. I feel everything inside of me is broken to pieces. So many people are dying. Libya is famous now, everyone knows of it, everyone. It is the tragic situation that made it so well known. I wish things were different. I wake up every morning thinking about Libya. I wake up every morning wishing things were different.

I'm really really sad about whats going on. I try to keep a normal routine for the sake of my sanity. It is very hard, but i'm trying my best. I have my exams coming up towards the end of May, i'm no where near prepared, but i'm going to try my best to catch up, it won't be easy, but i will try. It is so hard to focus with all that is going on. I hope that Libya will shine soon.

I miss it there so much. I was supposed to be there this April for a visit :(:( It was supposed to be my brother's wedding. All that is now not possible.

Inshallah things will get better soon, ya rab.